Last year, I went through a period of wanting to change something in my life. I wanted to do something just for me. After a few weeks of wondering what this dilemma would bring, I stumbled upon the Open University website and hey presto, a light bulb switched on over my head.
I could do this! It was distance learning so I wouldn’t have to think about the children if hubby was working away and the short courses only needed only a few hours input each week.
After trawling the website, I found the course I wanted to do. It was called Start Writing Fiction. I signed up straight away and had about three months to wait before the course started. I waited in eager anticipation for the coursework to arrive and when it did I was like a child at Christmas. I couldn’t wait to get started!
The start date soon came around and I sat at the P.C. all ready to go. For the first two weeks I really enjoyed it. Then came the third week and disaster struck. Hubby, toddler and myself all had the flu. The last thing I felt like doing when toddler went to bed was sitting at the computer desk.
We had the flu for a few weeks, so by the time I went back to the course, I was quite behind. Also, it was just before Christmas so there was that added pressure as well. That was when all my earlier confidence disappeared. Seeing how far in front the other students were only made it worse, too.
In the end, I withdrew from the course. I felt like a complete and utter failure and to this day I haven’t looked at any of the coursework or even been on the website because that just serves to remind me that I didn’t complete it. I look back now and think should I have made more of an effort? And perhaps maybe I should have, but that’s hindsight for you!
Today, however, from a thought out of nowhere, I pulled out one of the prospectuses that I had put away with all the coursework. There was still that thrill when I read about the different courses and I slowly all those thoughts started swirling around my head again and I began to wonder…
Should I? Could I? Dare I?
If I can just pluck up a little bit more confidence (and pray for no flu epidemic to break out) then there is a maybe just there…..
And is that a light I see shining above me…?